…to fathers that have poured out love to their children; fathers that have struggled with frustration, doubt, and fatigue; fathers who’ve changed to be better parents; new fathers; experienced fathers; fathers who have mentored, taught, and cared for children who are not their own; fathers who have helped other fathers and mothers to be better parents; fathers who have encouraged their sons and daughters to be confident and loving; and, of course, to my own dear dad, Happy Father’s Day to you.

I believe that our approach to religious pluralism is one of Unitarian Universalism’s greatest strengths. The six sources by which our religion is formed are the following:

• Direct experience of that transcending mystery and wonder, affirmed in all cultures, which moves us to a renewal of the spirit and an openness to the forces which create and uphold life;
• Words and deeds of prophetic women and men which challenge us to confront powers and structures of evil with justice, compassion, and the transforming power of love;
• Wisdom from the world’s religions which inspires us in our ethical and spiritual life;
• Jewish and Christian teachings which call us to respond to God’s love by loving our neighbors as ourselves;
• Humanist teachings which counsel us to heed the guidance of reason and the results of science, and warn us against idolatries of the mind and spirit.
• Spiritual teachings of earth-centered traditions which celebrate the sacred circle of life and instruct us to live in harmony with the rhythms of nature.

The only thing I would add to this, although perhaps it’s obvious, is that we draw from our Unitarian and Universalist theological heritage as well — our own history is a source of wisdom, tradition, and beliefs. So, while Unitarian Universalists are grounded in the history and traditions of our own religion, we are also open to finding meaning and belief and in other religions, people, and experiences.  This makes us uniquely suited to the challenges of 21st century America.

Our country is increasingly pluralistic; we’re a country of of people switching out of the faith (or non-faith) of their childhood, of interfaith marriages, of domestic struggles over religious freedom, and of foreign policy deeply informed (or misinformed) by our perceptions of non-Christian religions. 

 Let’s take a couple of practical examples of how we can meet the challenges of religious America… 

Being relevant. Our religion is relevant to the way Americans make meaning today. Most Americans do draw on many different sources for their beliefs — conversations with friends, books they read, what they see on television and in the movies, and dropping into classes or worship services in multiple faith traditions. Our approaches to spirituality in an interfaith world are going to be shaped by encounters with different people, experiences, and religions– Unitarian Universalism is encouraging us to undertake this exploration in an intentional and mindful way, with a community of support, reflection, and worship. 

Welcoming interfaith couples. As a member of an interfaith couple, I am so grateful that Unitarian Universalism has been welcoming not only to me, but also to my wonderful spouse. We were married in a Unitarian Universalist church, in a ceremony that included both UU and Jewish traditions and clergy. It felt right to me that in a marriage where we strive to both support one another, both of our religious traditions were included and celebrated. I’m not sure how easy it would have been to start our life this way, if I had been a member of a more conservative faith tradition.   

Unitarian Universalism offers not only a place for interfaith couples to have a meaningful wedding ceremony that incorporates multiple traditions, but also potentially, a place for both members of a couple to worship, engage in spiritual practice, and make friends. 

Promoting religious freedom on the local level. There is a constant stream of news stories from towns across American about infringements on religious freedom. These usually come in two varieties: separation of church and state issues, or attacks (verbal or physical) against congregations and individuals based on their faith traditions. In both cases, we as Unitarian Universalists can speak directly from our own religious beliefs about the need for religious freedom. Religious freedom isn’t just a cause we happen to feel strongly about — our commitment to religious freedom is grounded in our universalist theological heritage, in the very way that we do religion, and the very core of what our religious practice and structure is today.  

Addressing international issues. Now is the time for clear-eyed foreign policy, based on a truly informed understanding of other countries and cultures, especially those whose religion differs from our own. Unitarian Universalism’s six sources suggest that we should reject easy, hateful characterizations of other religious groups. Americans are grappling with fear and confusion about foreign policy, and the role of religion in that policy, and we as Unitarian Universalists have an opportunity to promote learning about other religious traditions in a fair way.  

Some Unitarian Universalists would say that our theologically diverse nature and our embrace of wisdom from many different traditions is our greatest obstacle — that it keeps us from a sense of unity and a clear message, that it hinders discussions of our deepest beliefs, that it keeps us too far at bay from our Christian religious heritage, and that it leads us to the misappropriate the traditions of other religions. In some circumstances and situations, that is true. But I’m convinced these are obstacles that we can overcome (and that we are already overcoming in some places), and that when we do, we offer a unique, relevant, spiritually-sustaining religious experience.    

Shout out of thanks to a prominent Unitarian Universalist religious education professional who recently sent me these book recommendations: Contemplative Youth Ministry and Growing Souls, both by Mark Yaconelli. The recommendations came in response to my plea for religious education resources. I’m looking forward to reading them.

Both books are Christian. Here’s the description from the Zondervan (a Christian publishing company) website of “Contemplative Youth Ministry”:

Youth ministry isn’t about what to say, what to do, or how to be; it’s about serving the needs of the students God has put in your life. This book is an attitude overhaul that creates a more organic approach to youth ministry that helps you create meaningful silence, covenant communities, and contemplative activities that allow your students recognize the presence of Jesus in their everyday lives.

“Meaningful silence, covenant communities, and contemplative activities” describes a spiritually challenging community for youth, whether they are UU or not. Basically, substitute “the Spirit” for “God” and “Jesus,” and I can imagine a UU version of this youth ministry model.Of course, reading work from another tradition and applying it to one’s own is never as simple as just substituting one word for another. There are values and theology that infuse a religious group or individual’s whole approach to life’s problems, and to really understand the approach, one can’t dismiss the values and theology as interchangeable with those of another faith.

But that doesn’t mean we (religious liberals, and Unitarian Universalists more specifically) don’t benefit from learning about how evangelicals are “doing church.”Church marketing and technology use are two areas that I am passionate about, and some of the most worthwhile resources in this area are produced by evangelicals. Here are a few of the fabulous evangelical resources that I read and/or listen to: Geeks and God (a podcast focusing on church website development, design and use; with a focus on listeners who are not techy savvy and/or are interested in learning about the Drupal content management system), Church Marketing Sucks (a blog that covers a wide range of marketing issues, from the graphic design of paper materials used by churches, to church website strategies, to congregational advertising campaigns), and the Blogging Church (a book on the best practices for congregational blogs).

All three of these resources were recommended by Anna Belle Leicherson, a UU web developer who writes her own blog about internet technology, Happy Web Diva, and who used to write Faith and Web.

In addition to our own “home-grown” resources that are produced by Unitarian Universalist writers and leaders, we can learn a great deal from the conversations going on within other faith traditions about issues in congregational life. I mentioned here resources from evangelical Christians because sometimes I find those the most difficult to engage with; evangelical Christianity is arguably the dominant group within American religion today, and even though it is not a monolith, it is a generally far more socially and theologically conservative group than Unitarian Universalists.

Yet, I find striking similarities between the problems they face in congregational life, especially in the areas of marketing and technology use. I think if we as UU’s are going to excel in those areas too, we need to not only invest in our own home-grown resources, but also venture far from home in our reading, listening and learning.

UUMomma is helping me kickstart my writing about religious education, with her recent post on “expectations of membership.” In this thought-provoking piece about what UU congregations should ask of members, she touches on many areas of church life (communications, donating time and money, and more). But what really leaped out at me was her section about the need for adults in the congregation to engage with children…

We expect you to find a way to be a part of the lives of the children in this congregation, even if you do not have any of your own. Hand them cookies on Sunday morning; read them a story during the Story for all Ages; be a part of their religious formation by teaching in their classroom one Sunday per month; ask them about the worship service they just attended, especially when they are young, so they understand that what we expect of them is an engagement with the message, not just time sitting in a pew.    

Yes! This passages reinforces for me several important lessons about religious education that I’ve started to learn in my work with my congregation youth group over the past year…

1. Children and youth are capable of experiencing the worship service (and other congregational activities) in a meaningful way and discussing that experience with adults. Not only are they able to appreciate and participate in worship, but they also need worship, spiritually activities just like adults do.

I’ve been working with youth in my congregation over the past year, and we’re starting to plan now for the year ahead. One of the big changes that I’m excited about for next year is that we’ll be holding programs for teenagers (i.e. Youth Group and Coming of Age) at a time that makes it easier for youth (and youth leaders, ahem) to attend worship! I feel that worship next year is going to be engaging for all ages, and that it will provide more spiritual “fuel” for our other programming for children and youth. Our youth deserve to be spiritually and intellectually nourished, and it seems to me that one of the biggest challenges of running a youth group is to offer this nourishment in a way that fits the developmental stages and life challenges of teens.

2. Adult engagement with children in congregations should be treated as a lay ministry — not a form of childcare. Religious education is not just taking care of children while their parents go do something else — it’s an opportunity to provide spiritual nourishment and emotional support. The best teachers and religious education staff already know this, and their programs have substance and depth.

One challenge I’ve faced as a youth group leader is trying to better understand, through conversation with youth and fellow adult leaders, what the mission of youth programming is. What I’ve come to believe is that a functional youth group is more than just a space for youth — it’s more than just a meeting time, place, and core of members and leaders. That’s just a container and some ingredients — like having a big bowl with some eggs and flour inside. But what are we making? What’s the final product that is more than the sum of its parts?I like the slogan often used with UU campus ministries: “spiritually alive, radically inclusive, and justice centered.” It’s short and clear, and presents goals and values that can be related to more concrete activities. I’ve been thinking about suggesting something similar to my fellow leaders, but with the goals of spiritual wholeness (including deepening knowledge of and grounding in Unitarian Universalism), connection to one another and the congregation, and contribution to the wider world.

3. Adults can contribute to positive experience of children in the congregation even if they themselves are not parents! Yes, it’s true! In fact, non-parents can be especially important as role models and program facilitators for teenagers. We made the decision this year in youth group to recruit leaders who were not parents of group members. While this has made it much more difficult to find youth group leaders, I think it’s been a good choice for our program at this time.

That said, I wish that we leaders had reached out more effectively to parents earlier on. We had a meeting of parents in the late spring of this year (after the program had been going on for months) and it was extremely valuable. I wish we had held regular meetings for parents throughout the year. I know…this sounds so obvious but it’s amazing what can get overlooked when one is pulling together a program for the first time! 

So those are a few thoughts on religious education, and I’ll probably write more on this topic as the summer goes on. In the meantime, if you have any suggestions for excellent RE resources (i.e. curriculum, leader training materials, etc.), especially related to teenagers, please e-mail me (ShelbyJMeyerhoff@gmail.com) or comment here — thanks!

After several weeks of blogcation, I’m happy to be back! The blogcation included a break from blogging here, at Street Prophets, and at the UU World. And it coincided with some time spent traveling with my husband Shai, which was absolutely wonderful.

Although I thought I would miss blogging, it was actually very relaxing to have some time away from home and not writing. I think it helped me remember to be more present and more in touch with what I’m seeing and feeling. The best writing is probably some combination of experiencing and reflecting, and both can be overdone.

Now that I’m returned, I’ve been catching up slowly on the UU blogs. I feel like I’ve missed a lot — I thought frequently while on blogcation of UU blogging friends and some of the different life struggles and joys that have been shared recently. I did miss responding to blogs and comments, with the sense of giving and receiving support with other readers and bloggers.

As for upcoming posts, I have a couple of topics bouncing around my head. One is about religious education for children and youth. As the church year is wrapping up, I’m looking back on a year of helping run one of the RE program offerings in my congregation, and planning for another year ahead. I’m considering carefully what the mission of a religious education program should be, and what kinds of programs and leaders best serve that mission in practice. I’ve learned some lessons from my own experience, however limited, and would like to share some of those and also learn from the insights of other readers. ‘Til the next post…!