After my plea for help with religious education resources, a leader in Unitarian Universalist religious education e-mailed me to suggest reading Mark Yaconell’s Contemplative Youth Ministry, a book about Christian youth ministry.

I’m happy to enthusiastically recommend this book to other UU’s interested in working with youth. It’s a nuanced book and embedded in the Christian tradition, so I can’t do it justice in a blog post, but I can note a few lessons I drew from it that may apply to Unitarian Universalist youth ministry, whether in a Christian or a non-Christian context.

The central premise of the book is that successful youth ministry programs grow from spiritually healthy youth group leaders who are attuned to the needs of youth in their congregation or community, and to the direction in which God is calling these youth.

Rather than give a one-size-fits-all formula for a thriving youth program, Yaconelli suggests that through spiritual practice and attentiveness to youth, leaders will be able to discern the unique shape that their congregation’s youth programming should take.

As a UU minister of religious education recently told me, “the people are the curriculum.”

Of course, shifting the focus from finding the right formula to following the spirit is a leap of faith. Yaconelli is well aware of this, and encourages persistence and patience as the remedies to the anxiety and desire for quick results that many youth leaders feel.

In line with his emphasis on trusting God to lead youth programs in the right direction, Yaconelli urges a discernment-based approach to youth leader recruitment. He discourages what I would call the sinking-ship approach to leader recruitment (i.e. “Help! Someone! Anyone! The youth program is sinking. Come on board.”) Instead, he suggests asking members of the congregation to recommend other congregants whom they think would work well with youth. Yaconelli cautions against looking for people who are young and “hip,” but instead suggests seeking people of all ages who have the spiritual and personal qualities needed.

One final piece I want to highlight is Yaconelli’s attention to the dynamics between those adults who are leading a congregation’s youth ministry. He writes:

Most congregations — and most youth ministry leaders — tend toward either a chaos approach or a control approach to staff meetings. Yet neither of these extremes — nor the continuum that lies between them — is grounded in Christian living….Instead, there should exist a spiritual community — a covenant group that is attentive to God, discerning of the Spirit, and caring for one another.

The annual meeting of Unitarian Universalists, held this year in Fort Lauderdale, Florida, concluded on Sunday. For those of you who, like me, weren’t there in person, there’s plenty of coverage online. Here are some links…

I pointed out the beginning blog coverage of General Assembly in last week’s Interdependent Web, and there’s plenty more to be found from the past few days on UUpdates.net

If you’re looking for video of major events, the Unitarian Universalist Association’s website has video of the plenary sessions, worships, major speakers, and other high-profile programming.

And Rev. Dan Harper’s presentation, “Spreading Unitarian Universalism Using New Media,” which he developed with UU video wiz Peter Bowden, may be of special interest to blog readers and writers.

Just a quick note that Unitarian Universalist minister and author Rev. Kate Braestrup is the guest this week on “Speaking of Faith” (download available here) an American public radio program about religion. Braestrup wrote Here if You Need Me, an acclaimed memoir about the death of her husband, Drew, and her subsequent decision to become a UU chaplain with the Maine Warden Service.

Braestrup also spoke recently at the Unitarian Universalist Association, when she received the UUA’s Melcher Book Award. Her talk was lively and meaningful. She described Drew and his commitment to BGLT rights, which he defended in his work in a trooper and in volunteer service to his congregation. See the videos below for the full talk.

at the UU World’s Interdependent Web this week.

Also, I noticed while at the UU World that they have a General Assembly blog!

Congratulations to gays and lesbians who married today in California, and to those couples who are excitedly planning their weddings! Unitarian Universalists have been on the forefront of advocating for marriage equality nationally, in Massachusetts, and in California. And UU California congregations and their members have been celebrating the legalization of gay and lesbian weddings in California. (For more information, visit the UU Legislative Ministry, California, or check out these articles about the Humboldt UU’s and the First Unitarian Universalist Church of San Francisco).

I have happy memories of when same-sex marriage was legalized here in Massachusetts, on May 17, 2004. I stood outside Cambridge City Hall with my now-husband Shai, and with seemingly hundreds of other supporters (and only a tiny number of protestors) while couples received their licenses, starting at midnight. The atmosphere was like an amazing party. It was one of the most moving, euphoric public events I’ve ever attended. That night, a couple who belong to my congregation became the first couple in Massachusetts to file for a wedding license.

Later that year, I attended my minister’s wedding to her longtime partner, where congregants, friends, and of course, their two children, were there to celebrate. Again, it was such a joyful occasion.

I think of marriage between two people who love each other and are committed to one another as a sacred bond. Caring for another person with respect, compassion and steadfastness is a sacred act. The joy I felt when I saw gay and lesbian couples finally able to marry comes out a sense of religious awe for what marriage can be. While some opponents of same-sex marriage claim that it trivializes marriage, I see the movement for marriage equality coming out a continuing belief that marriage can be sacred, transformative, and deeply nourishing. It’s because marriage does matter in our social and religious context that so many people want to see the benefits and responsibilities of marriage be made available not only to some people, but to all people.