Moments of Connection

What associations come to mind when you think of airports?

Here are a few things that airports make me think of: saying goodbye to loved ones, eating greasy food, pacing the hallways when a flight is delayed, running down the hallways trying to make a connection, making contact with lots of germs (!), and generally being bored out of my mind.

Last Thursday was a welcome exception to that pattern. Shai (my husband) and I flew out of Logan airport down to Baltimore. We showed up with plenty of time to spare, so I headed to a seafood restaurant in the terminal and Shai went off in search of vegetarian fare.

In the restaurant, I hauled my bags through a crowd of people and squeezed into a seat at a long row of tables, each one mere inches from the next. I pulled out a book to read while eating. Then, about halfway into the meal, an older woman sitting next to me, eating dinner with her husband, remarked on my book. We had a lively conversation for the remainder of the meal. As we talked, I noticed that the young man sitting on the other side of me had also started up a conversation with the guy sitting next to him. I wondered how many people end up in unexpected conversations in this airport restaurant, simply due to sitting so closely together.

I was in a good mood the rest of the evening. There’s something heartening about making a friendly connection with a former stranger.

One of the principles of the Unitarian Universalist Association is that our congregations promise to affirm and promote “respect for the interdependent web of existence of which we are all a part.”

Although this principle is often interpreted in environmental terms (we are connected to the trees, the water, to other animals, etc.), it is also deeply relevant to how each of us understands our place within the family of humanity. There are a lot of forces in the world conspiring to make us feel lonely, isolated, and downright frightened of one another. When I consider the atrocities committed by people, I think I’d rather not be so interdependent.

I long to be reminded, again and again, that while yes we human beings can and do inflict terrible suffering on one another, we also help one another experience hope, fulfillment and peace.

That’s one of the major reasons that I go to church. I like the warm feeling I have showing up for worship, small group discussion, or even a simple potluck, and knowing that I’m connected to others in a positive way. I suspect that’s why people are members of congregations in many different faiths. Does the belief system of a given tradition matter? Of course! But so does the feeling of showing up and having someone smile at you, touch your hand during prayer or hug you hello, share a hymn book with you and in other ways affirm that you are worthy of being noticed and cared for.

These are the things that most of us long for when we go to church. And these little acknowledgements of connection are also what we can give one another when we are together in our congregations.

What associations come to mind when you think of church?

At its best, congregational life is not only defined by values, obligations, and rituals — but also by smiles, hugs, eye contact, greetings, invitations to things going on in the church and the myriad other small gestures that affirm our inherent value and our place in the larger family of humanity.